You may devote gobs of time and energy to exercising, choosing outfits, and getting your makeup just right, but then something as small as your handshake could send very different signals about your personality.
Psychologists call it the "spotlight effect": People generally don't pay nearly as much attention to you as you think they do. But when they are motivated to pay attention and interested in you they pay attention to each and every minute detail in your personality. Not just to your outfit and your haircut, but to seemingly trivial things, like your handwriting, handshakes, and how fast you walk.
The handshake may have originated in prehistory as a demonstration of peaceful intent since it shows that the hand holds no weapon. Another possibility is that it originated as a symbolic gesture of mutual commitment to an oath or promise: two hands clasping each other represents the sealing of a bond.
It was a symbol of peace, showing that neither person was carrying a weapon. During the Roman era, the handshake was more of an arm grab. It involved grabbing each other’s forearms to check that neither man had a knife hidden up his sleeve. Some say that the shaking gesture of the handshake started in Medieval Europe. Knights would shake the hand of others in an attempt to shake loose any hidden weapons.
Handshaking is a typical greeting behaviour and is often one of the first observations that individuals make of each other upon meeting. Thus, the handshake may be a basis for some of the initial impressions that an individual forms about another. I believe handshakes are a means to communicate information about a person's personality. They signify a greeting, but they also help inspire feelings of trust and intimacy.
The types of handshakes and their significance:-
The limp handshake
How does it make you feel when you go in for a handshake with someone and it feels like their hand is nonexistent? According to Dr Glass, a weak handshake exemplifies a lack of interest. “If you lack all firmness, it tells the other person you don’t care; you’re not into them.” Whether it’s a stranger or a professional, people are sensitive toward your gestures, and will likely form immediate judgments from your handshake that set the tone of your circumstances.
The rushed handshake
Rushing a handshake as quickly as you come out shows nervousness, according to Dr. Glass. People who can’t hold on for a moment to establish the introduction show discomfort. “It also shows that they don’t care to be in the situation at all, which offends the receiver.” Rushing anything typically never makes for a positive outcome, so slow it down to generate calmness.
The perfect handshake
To make a good first impression, a handshake can mean everything. “A good handshake entails the initiator’s palm touching the receiver’s palm, with their thumb wrapped around the other’s thumb,”. You want to make sure your grasp is firm, but not too firm, and not too light. “Always maintain eye contact, but ensure you have a soft, warm gaze. Any intense glare is to be avoided.”
When I was taking lessons from Colonel Praveen Chandra for the NDA examination, he mentioned just two things,
1) When you shake your hand with a man, look them in the eye, smile slightly, and make the handshake a firm one. It makes you a charismatic and confident personality. More than the personality it makes people remember you. Just a tiny handshake and a smile help people register a memory about you.
2) When you greet a woman, Gently take her hand into yours, make the shape of the saucer and give her all the commands with her hand on the top. To build more trust, introduce your free hand and gently place it on her hand, you will be thought of throughout the day.
It doesn't matter how much success we've had or what we're about to achieve, those few seconds in which we physically connect will reveal more about our character than any letters after our name or the title on a business card.
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